After reading US sprinting Phenom, TaylorPhinneys Twitter, @taylorphinney i was amused by some of the terms he used regarding cycling. He “slayed” the kilo today. He had a really tough “roller sesh” and it got me thinking 1: what other cool terms are out there and 2: Can i be creative enough and come up with some new terminology that will catch on and one day be heard on the Champs-Élysées podium!
ok so lets see…(a note of caution that the terms below are my definitions of the words and will without doubt be as incorrect as a wikipedia posting)
1: Bidon: a water bottle for cycling I think the word Bidon is way under used. Hearing Sean Kelly say it always makes me laugh so that has to make it cool.
2: Cadence: the rotations your legs make when cycling. Now this isnt a cool word BUT when you say it like Sean Kelly does (is this blog about Sean Kelly???) then it is cool. I think it would be spelt caydawwwwwnce. Tell your team mates that you now climb with a very high “caydawwwwwnce”
3: Slayed: going hard with positive results. Slaying is a new term to me which i thought was uncool at first but then grew on me. I guess thats the sign of a good cycling term, no? Well i slayed my race yesterday. Sadly somone else did their slaying 2 mins faster than i did mine but a successful slaying it was none the less.
4: Fred: a cyclist who looks the part but quite clearly isnt. We ALL know a fred. They look great and you see their pics on facebook at training camps in the sun when your slogging away in the rain and snow. The reality is they pull out of races with flat tires (wink wink) or someone lost a wheel and got me dropped etc. I have to say tho that we were all freds at some point so lets not get too carried away with hating on our fellow cyclists!!! peace and love!
5: Chapeau: a french term for which basically means hats off. Its used by the more cultured of the cycling community but id like to see it become more widespread. Chapeau to to the lad who still enters time trials despite finishing 15minutes after the marshals have gone home just cos he loves cycling! Chapeau to the cyclist who gets dropped in a race and still finishes it out arriving in 2 hours after the sandwiches are eaten. Chapeau to the attacker at the start of a days racing knowing the potential for pain could be beyond what he is willing to endure. Next time your out cycling go alongside someone and throw a “chapeau” their way.
Now for the tricky bit. How can i come up with some new words?Some of these are used by my cycling friends but would be new to most outsiders. lets give it a go…(help appreciated!)
1: a Jonathon: a cyclist who is worse than a fred. They are an absolute beginner. They do the craziest of things like attack in training spins then go straight out the back of the group. They wear football socks and have mudguards that stick out at like 45degrees. They are uncool!
2: scrubber: a rider who sits on the wheel and lets others do the work. We all know the pain of keeping a nice pace into a head wind. Well some people would say that i dont know this pain and that im a “scrubber”! harsh words i know but there is some truth to it. A scrubber is someone who is allergic to wind, or even hard efforts for that matter! They sit on the wheel and then end the day as fresh as a daisy. To be honest i call these people smart 😉
3:Half race Hero: a rider who rides to impress people but usually doesnt finish a race. They will ride in the wind and at the front and have a good chat to you during the race about hill repeats they were doing yesterday, then BOOM… they are gone. You see them driving out of the car park when your rolling in from “slaying” yourself all day and they give you a wave and a nod but never look you in the eye!
Having read these back i actualy think i fall into all three categories quite well. Im now thinking of taking up golf.
Love Cycling 
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